Is it so hard to just believe?

Friday, December 12

- 9:44 AM

this is the 113th post. Is that a good number?

I'm off!!!

Paris + Luxembourg, back on the 21st =D

Sunday, December 7

- 6:49 PM

Camp was good, Life is getting better, Nights are getting longer:) things are looking up.

Plus, love always helps doesnt it bossman? HAHA

ok time to go, tooodles!

Thursday, November 27

- 2:13 PM

Wow the 110th post here! Not bad not bad.

hmmm after Os has been eventful :)

Meeting up with people I havnt see in ages (LOOP!! and seth! and chingy!) and miss LIKE WHOA,

Madagascar 2 ( mort!)

cleaning up my room (yes, its finally clean and dust-bunny free) ,

PROM ( was more fun then I expected + mongyi in a dress) ,

Purple streaks! ( not exactly what I wanted but its fine)

Patching it up with ahem ( yaeeee I missed you there)

Talking on the phone till crazy late hours ( 5 am wthhhhh+ finally sherilyn you want your name here HERE IT IS HAHA) ,

fundraising carwash in church ( then bumping into dweebee the suspected bisexual),

NP red camp ( go ninjas, shake that thanggg!)

Oh and did I mention? revenge can be so sweet :D seth and boss know what I'm talking about HAHA

I'm totally looking forward to the POTC marathon at mere's later :D :D :D :D

and in the future to come:

Many other movie marathons!

SETH SETH SETH SETH SETH ( I miss you muchmuch too!)

church camp

Ninjas outing (?)

cooking pasta for dweebee

187653218938 house parties I must somehow go to :P

SHERS BACK OMGGGG FINALLY! ( see your name again!)

The great AHEM with Moley xD

Seeing G and Joy and Sham!

Paris + Luxembourg

CHRISTMAS oh gods

and omg omg so much more stuff heh

OH and tags tags replies to tags

- : yes, I am sensitive to other peoples comments about me. And screw off please :D If you dont leave your name dont talk

Untitled : Uh, yeah ok. You love me? Thats........... nice haha. Why not tell me in person? Same goes for you unfortunately : screw off unless you leave your name

Lester: yeap. Uh, lets talk elsewhere.

Rick: Yes yes, you amuse me so. And of course they deserve each other, theyre all the same kinda.............. I tell you later XD

Sher: OMG HIS NIPPLES haha bad mental image there!

Peewee : I'm sorry, but my "I" key isnt working so its peewee for now xD YES OMG NINJAS OI!!

Oh and :

Sam : uh, yeah I'm a hairy kid, glad that turns you on? seriously, do I know you? Like, screw off.

Kara: uh, nobody calls you egg. Youre not egg. You CHOSE that nickname yourself!

Kara/ Nerissa/ maw: Uhh you dont even talk to me IN CHURCH and youre tagging? ok like, just go away. Now. Permanently.

Speaking of going away permanently.......

- 2:13 PM

Friday, November 14

- 8:47 PM

Dear everybody,

I HAVE GRADUATED.

ten years, and I'm finally graduating. And when I went up to get my diploma, I didnt trip :)

Friday, November 7

- 7:09 PM

MO MO I am daym angry I need to rant at you cause its that poem that came out. THAT POEM! OMG the one I said I hate and I hope it never comes out! Thst damn poem I said I couldnt do at all and I really couldnt stand or identify with! The ONE singaporean-based poem I said I couldnt do the ONLY ONE OMG where are you!!! i NEED TO RANT!!! unless youre gonna give me the long lecture about karma luh :P

AND THE FUNNIEST THING. I got out of lit to be greeted by 2 msgs from rickabye. and the first one said " HAHAHAHAHAH I JUST SAW A GUY WITH THE NAMETAG PRABHU HAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHHAHAHAHAHAH"

HAHA! my prabhuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu I love/will miss youuuuuuuuuuuu. As do the other 9543824121234 girls in your very horny fanclub -.- your influence no doubt.

Like peewee said, I feel like even though I'm still shackled ( bio mcq SAD) its like the ball on the chain has fallen away! heh

Love ya Dweebs (: soon soon! and the hair on *ahem* other parts of my body too !

Sunday, November 2

- 2:03 PM

HAHA
Since shes the only other person besides MJ to love Paolo nutini =D
and she misses me
and she is so cute with her cat kungfu
and she is small and cute
and she puts up with my lian-ing
and cause everyone needs to smile once in a while =D

(for dweebs)

Take me wandering through these streets,

Where bright lights and angels meet,

Stone to stone they take me on,

I'm walking to the break of dawn.

Saturday, November 1

- 7:12 PM

Ok, theres like this huge blog thing going on, and its argh. Uncalled for and uneeded.

It just annoys me. Alot.

Obviously, I'm not going to say much here, cause its not a good place to.

All I'm gonna say is, the comments were rather uncalled for, in any sense, and oh yeah

IVAN IS AWESOME.

Cheerio :)

- 4:02 PM

Ok so far, O's has been not so bad. Except for the night before bio, not bad at all.
Our last-minue rvising when we gather in the amphi has consisted of Cass and I singing really, REALLY retarded songs and claire laughing at us OH and just before bio scaring everyone with the "WHATS DNA HELICASE!!? " question ( its not in syllabus btw haha). I love how the whole Gy just huddles together when the rest of the classes are mixed up. UNITY yeah WOOOOOO. And I never fail to disgust leanna with my happy dance after each paper is collected heh. VAL haha hers what happened the other day
*end of paper, we're all going to collect bags*
me : " VAL VAL ITS OVERRRRRR AYEEE"
Val: " YAE YAEEEEE ITS OVER!!!!!!! " *jumps up and down*
me : * also jumps up and down*
sees zay
me " ZAY ZAY YAE OMG ITS OVERRRRRRRR"
Zay " yeap, thank goodness"
me " aiyoh so un-enthu"
Zay : what, I'm supposed to jump up and down?"
me : " YES!! YAE YAE ITS OVER!!!!!" *jumps up and dowm*
Zay: " ahaha ok! YAE YAE ITS OVERRRRRRRRR!!!" * jumps up and down*

HAHA I LOVE AND MISS YOU TOO VAL =D

I promise to come visit you alot so you wont throw thendrum! haha

AND DWEEBEEEEEE I MISS YOU TOO haha

when when when are we goinggggg I cant wait!!! and I thought of the craziest thing to do there ok when I tell you please dont scream at me XD

Oh, and I just read this. On some girls blog.

She's one of those angmoh mix with chinese people the baby...I forgot what term is used for such people.Very tall.Art student.Quite indiscrible.She's the type of girl who will only stick with her friends.She's from SC and yeah...Looks like a lion because of her hair.She scares me somtimes.Has an angmoh voice and speaks singlish when she's in a laughing kinda mood.Plans very interesting and really fun games.Somehow,she's just not the type of person who I can ever say anything except 'hi' to.The rest will just be senseless,useless talk.

I not offended so much by the content of what was posted, as some of it can be complimentary, but I'm just as opposed to people like this who post about me and pretend they know me. This is not a personal attack, I just prefer that you REMOVE it please. And never speak to me again. Its not like I scare you on purpose y'know. I just happen to be taller then you, and you cant accept that.

Saturday, October 18

- 12:14 PM

And I know best of all, how many of you can see right through me

Picking up the pieces
Of the wreck you went and left
And I'm dealing with dilemmas
In my now so stressful life
And I'm drinking stronger spirits
I made my home here on the floor
And I'm losing all ambition and goals

I'm going all out
I'm thinking you're just as bad

No sleeping at night
But I'm going from bar to bar
Why can't we just rewind
Why can't we just rewind
Why can't we just rewind

Oh remember at 16
Oh the crazy drunken night we had
When i kissed you in the hallway
Then i took you straight to bed

Two years on
And I'm still that same boy i was

No sleeping at night
But I'm going from bar to bar
Why can't we just rewind
Why can't we just rewind
Why can't we just rewind oh

No sleeping at night
But I'm going from bar to bar
Why can't we just rewind
Why can't we just rewind
Why can't we just rewind oh

You might blame it on me
But you insisted that we fall
Wiped your hands of me
And said you needed more, more, more

I'm not sleeping at night
But I'm going from bar to bar
Why can't we just rewind
Why can't we just rewind
Why can't we just rewind oh

I'm not sleeping at night
But I'm going from bar to bar
Why can't we just rewind
Why can't we just rewind
Why can't we just rewind oh

Wo woah woah woah
Wo woah woah woah
Wo wo woah
Can't we just rewind

Friday, October 17

- 9:03 PM

Three more days to O's ( I should be feeling really really nervous :/ instead I feel guilty that I don't)
My head is just full of random random things today.

The weather was good =D
I love it when our school delivers HOT food to study camp and its frickin cold out
Our Bio-nic teacher is effing funny ( more power to him)

Prabhu is such an amusing guy
why be one of many when you could be a legend?
I love cass and serene and Ana for entertaining me/putting up with my nonsense
I love seth and gay brettnnate and carrie and moley for the same reason
I love bossman too for putting up with my nonsense ( read-----> in a totally friendly way)
Squishy regrets losing you
I miss my Big brother (still) but I'm not really sad about it anymore (really)
Staring at his tattoos and my scars arent gonna make them disappear y'know
things somehow taste better when youre hungry
Absorbing information by diffusion doesnt work! ohno!
My eldest cousin got engaged O.o Muchhappiness to her
The girl on page eleven of the life section is doing an obscene sign and doesnt know it! ( leanne peiwen rae know!)
serene scared me by telling me to check the CHEM timetable and my name wasnt there
Being different isnt the problem. Rejecting those who are is

And I just saw my tagboard. HOW DO YOU EDIT THAT THING!!??

Thursday, October 16

- 6:39 PM

Next tuesday, the 21st of october= Start of O's

Three weeks from then, 13th of november = Last paper!

(jiayou jiayou jiayou!)

And somehow, I am more worried about how sian I'll be in the five (free) days before my last paper. Its like, Lit paper on the 7th, then NOTHING for 5 days, then BIO MCQ omg hate the planning committee! :P Then about I'm gonna do for the O's.

And also, my cousin got engaged =D eldest cousin. I think what her fiance did for her was really sweet heh. He got thrown out of the house for dating her, but he loved her anyway and now theyre gonna get married =D means I'll be flying to aussieland for that.

And also, today was INSANE haha shouting " I AM PRABHU, WHO ARE YOU!!?" everywhere. Serene remember our deal ok! haha.

And also, I miss you horribly G I miss you and your retarded pranks and all. Quit your job and come see me soon! (haha kidding) I need my big brother :( (not kidding)

And also, cheer up bossman =D haha I dunno why I'm saying that! do the happy danceeeeeeeee

And also, we are SO going to have our movie marathon ana haha CONSTANTINE and STARDUST

And also, I miss you like WHAT val you and your thendrums HAHA stamp your feet and take tiny steps to see me and I'll let you draw all over my arms and head and whatever =D

And also,

Peace out peo-ple Y

Wednesday, September 17

- 6:39 PM

haha this is the 101st post. Like DALMATIONS *lame* ok nevermind.

Todays Vals last day in school, damn sad :( gonna miss her alot alot alot VAL when I next see you I'll let you vandalise me as much as you want LIKE SERIOUSLY.

And I was just blog-surfing, and SOME GIRL I hrdly even know called me a bimbo. LIKE WTFFFF shes like, one of those not so nice people that kinda get ostracised at school by even the wierdos (me, haha) and yeah I even tried to be nice to her and chat with her now and then and stuff, and I thought she was a person that was a bit wierd, but tolerable. THEN SHE CALLED ME A BIMBO thanks alot ok. Fine I'm not going to bother with her anymore LET HER ROT IN A CORNER OMG fine. hahaah Nah if she wants to insult people she doesnt know, ok luh go ahead I'm not going to be like you.

ANDDDDDD shers back in a week or so. Apparently I cant see her this time :( but still, its nice to know she'll be closer by :D my guardian angel. Make me sad and she'll kick your ass heh. Love ya babe.

And to all the unknowns and untitled and anonymouses, ok fine be that way, just msg me to tell me its you k. OR ITS CONFUSING.

thats all for today I guess.

OH OH WAIT OMG I havnt done this in ages (ref below)

Thought of the day: theres no point being clever here, everyones clever. Try to be kind, just a little kind *quote unquote*

Friday, September 12

- 9:03 PM

TIRED.

oh gods why did last years sec 4's lie and say sec 4 was work hard play hard?

WHERES THE PLAYING PART OMGG.

damn. At least I got my fairys with magic wands next door, smores, and youtube :D

and of course, really lame jokes.

MOSQUITO out.

Thursday, September 11

- 9:17 PM

GY dont you ever lose your voice?

always making so much noise

everyday just talk about boys

(its such a GY thanggg)

Girls I gotta tell you the truth

breaking up is hard to do

And thats why I'll miss you

OMG like, GY

you seriously make me want to cry

what will I do without you guys?

I really cant bear to say goodbye

(now, where did THAT come from?)

(and yes, its not completed yet!)

Wednesday, September 10

- 8:29 PM

Today was so retarded!

OMG they had this contemporary dance troupe based on math come in. All I could think of was RICKY FROM SO YOU THINK YOU CAN DANCE. YEA YEA that dude who was like " when you dance, every angle your body makes has to be perfect" and he danced REALLY WELL ohman. So that was all I could think of. Then the "leader" came on and she gave us this long damn boring talk like they all do, and the whole time I was like RICKY RICKY RICKY and then the demonstrations looked ok, then the dance started. Lets just say I ALSO CAN RUN IN CIRCLES AND WAVE MY HANDS OK. Plus, if a group of us do it, we can do in IN SYNC. Like doOd c'mon. damn I miss RICKY why did he have to leave :(

ricky ricky ricky ricky ricky ricky WHERE ARE YOU. COME BACK AND DO YOUR DANCE THANGGGGG hahaha

oh and,

(thank you for reminding me I had this)

Sunday, September 7

- 11:01 PM

Hey everybody :)

I'm ok now. I'm not gonna remove the angry red words, but I no longer feel so strongly. The balls in his court now, and I cant make amends unless I'm allowed to. True, It'll be great if we could be close friends again, but if not, well- different friends for different seasons :)

Saffys back in a week. WOOOOOOOOOO

Moley needs courage, everybody will your courage towards him so he can SEIOUSLY JUST DO WHAT HE HAS TO ALREADY

Rick's got emokid scars on his arms now, and likes to abuse animals by cutting his pet gerbils and spanking his monkey XD yaeeeeee dont kill me nice pushpop buddy!!! HAHAH

GAY NatenBrett are so the love :D thank you dears. Love you like aly and aj kinda WOAH!! hahaha

EVERYBODY go listen to lullabye by shawn mullins. The chorus is addictive,a dn so is his rather hypnotic voice :)

I wish kaixin were here :( we're not close or anything, but she knows how to fix EVERYTHING. and I just feel lubby today.

Lubby, FYI, is feeling lazy and tubby together, and you just want to laze about the house, watch tv, eat, and cant study. thats LUBBY.

I wish sherilyn were here even more. I need a hug :( I feel LONELY

haha ohwell. I'm off to dance with darth vader in my jammies and sing lullabye :D

Tuesday, September 2

- 6:07 PM

OK FINE ALL THE FUCKERS OUT THERE you can stop badgering me now I lost a friend ok IS THAT ENOUGH TO SHUT YOU UP???? I LOST A BEST FRIEND, THE KID WHO REALLY REALLY CARED ABOUT ME AND YES ITS MY FAULT NOW PLEASE shut the hell up and leave me alone. ITS NONE OF YOUR BUSINESS who he is or what I said or why I DONT CARE if you think I'm a terrible person CAUSE HEY GUESS WHAT I PROLLY AM I dont care what you think, cause youre not the people who matter to me, I just find you FUCKING ANNOYING YOU DONT EVEN KNOW MY NAME dont come asking me questions, getting the latest scoop on me so you can pretend to know me and spread it around so everyone knows FUCK OFF WANKERS I'M SAYING IT HERE AND NOW I LOST A FRIEND AND YES I MISS HIM isnt its a miracle that I have feelings oh my god none of you ever knew that!!! WELL NOW YOU DO NOW JUST LEAVE ME ALONE HATE ME WHATEVER I DONT CARE I'M BEYOND CARING ABOUT ANYTHING BUT TRYING TO GET MY FRIEND BACK SO PLEASE LEAVE ME IN PEACE UNLESS YOU WANT ME ON YOUR ASS GO AWAY GO AWAY GO AWAY GO AWAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

- 4:51 PM

Today was omg great! went to school, then bus-ed down to coronation for lunch, supposedly. It was overrun with HCI people, so we walked all the way down to mad jacks, where I realised I was actually starving, and stupidly ordered a blue mountain burger and fries. Plus sharing a brownie with cass, I feltt so sick after that! was effing high on the way back to school , doing model struts and waving to everyone and bitching about ahem :P and in study camp, pranking random people and playing squash outside the room with a tennis ball and racquets. Damn retarded please! hope that person doesnt discover the little round black marks on the wall :P heh.

It was good cause I could immerse myself completely in the 4gy-ers and work and completely forget last night. Thanks nate, for you damn good physic timing and your very nice shoulder :) if not making my day, you stopped me from being stupider. (no, I promised I wont do it and I wont k?) you rock my world man.

And to uh, you, kinda obvious who the you is. I don't want us to be like this. You said you meant so little to me, I proved you wrong. You said I didnt care about you? wrong again. How did I betray you? I dont understand what youre saying at all, not at all. I didnt lie to you, reveal your secrets, backstab you, anything. All I said was that if you did get involved with a her, a huge part of us would have to change, cause that part is not acceptable if either one of us is involved in a relationship. And if I sounded hurt, I was. Walk in my shoes for a while. Wouldnt you be? Say if someones been this close to you for months, made all sorts of promises, said all kinds of things youd never dreamed anyone would, and you trusted them. Say you made each other happy, and you knew that cause thats what they told you. And that theyd love you no matter what you thought you were, that you made their day, meant everything to them. Say you intended to keep every single one of those promises you made, even the craziest ones. Say you trusted that person completely, gave them a place in your heart, Say that sometimes youd have to discuss if you guys were stepping beyond the line labelled "friends" or not. Then say that that person suddenly decides that you no longer make them happy, that youre just another person who they happen to know better, Thats all you are. And then, they find someone else who does make them happy, and REPLACES YOU. Now tell me you're ok with it.

Look, I know I'm in the wrong. I shouldnt have been so rash, so odd. Shouldnt have said what I did, it only served to confuse you more I suppose, and to piss you off. I guess I sounded a bit like a bratty kid demanding something, in this case, you. I do want you to be happy, just not excluding me, is that too much to ask? you could just say so.But I guess now you know where I'm coming from . You know pretty much wHat you mean to me (the world) you know what I'd do to patch things together again. Just tell me what it is. Go back in time, a few months, when we first started out, and we were finally friends. How you used to encourage me in art, and I'd cheer you on in debate and cap. How youd be so damn tired, but still humour me, and I'd try to figure out how we could meet (which never worked), how I'd use you as a muse for my art and some poems, and you'd amaze me with your writing. GO back and read what you wrote on your birthday post, what you wrote on the 19th of april (remember that day?), 10th june. Thats when you started to confuse me too, and thats when I started to, yeah. Remember when I said I'd always love you. Don't end our friendship. It makes for tears and regret, and we both have enough of that.

I don't think I'll say anymore. Dont bother me, unless its you. Typing your heart out onto a cold screen is hard without letting your guts flow onto the floor at the same time.

Wednesday, August 20

- 6:28 PM

When you gaze upon the dead, remember this: you have been shown more than you can understand.

Sunday, August 17

- 5:52 PM

HAPPY BIRTHDAY SHERILYN (<----see your favourite colour) you crazy shit hope you have fun with all your nice aussie friends :D
(and your blue hair OMG your blue hair!!!)

and don't forget your very special song:D teeheehee. WHALE SKIN TIGHTS!!

XOXO

Wednesday, August 13

- 3:53 PM

PRELIMS OVER haha poor YT. yeap, everyone's blogging about them recently. Like c'mon theyre pretty important what!
Watched the mummy :D it was rather amusing, cause it was unintentionally funny at points. You'll know what I mean if you watch it. Directors should really take the hint and note that you should pick ONE language to work with throughout the entire movie!
All my souffle-making experiments failed horribly, and I'm now banned from telling AHEM some people about any future experiments I may choose to carry out :P apparently due to terrible mental imagery involving eating babies.
I think I said alot of things that I prolly shouldnt have, and they just made things worse for you, but I'm not sure if I want to say sorry, cause I think you needed a bit of a kick, and I just had to be the unlucky one to provide it this time. I don't know how to ask you to be yourself again soon without adding to your already huge burden, and since I obviously can't help you in any way, what am I to do? what do you want me to do? I bet youre as lost as I am. I just hope I don't lose you, starshine.

Wednesday, July 30

- 2:07 PM

(dont kill me people I promise that if it happens again I'll go see the doctor ok? you know how I hate the hospital :P)

Todays 3rd day of prelims, I'm damn screwed for amath. Hopefully paper 2 will be better. I'm not supposed to blog, technically, cause I need to study, but I feel so saturated already so OHWELL. As rick never fails to remind me, I am SO not focused :(

And yes its true his name is REGINALD haha the 3rd name on the list of nasty names :P I swear its KARMA. But ohwell he's nice :) and hes 185 friggin tall right! and he has HUMOUNGOUS hands and and and these super jet black eyes :D PLUS he can CARRY me, with NO EFFORT haha damn fun xD yaeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee

I've missed feeling like this :)

TIME TO STUDY AGAIN! LIT FTW!

Since youre strong enough to carry me, when me legs are to weak to support me, will you carry me away from here to die ?

Friday, July 25

- 6:55 PM

Prelims next week. I'd give my wisdom teeth to have just one more week to revisem esp for SS and Amath. SO not prepared.
And its so wierd how we really see peoples true colours in times of great turmoil, stress, and the like. Its just odd.I always figured we'd be ok, but maybe its time to remove those rose-tinted spectacles and see how ugly things can get. Where did all our happy, peaceful months go?
and of course, shoutouts, since I do realise that I've been distant. Sorry m'dear :(
To our dear bronx dude: yes, it WAS devine! haha but it suits you, so I'm keeping it.
To my dear hubby: heh I love you babe :) thanks for you encouragement, and for all the times I know youre friggin tired but try to humour me anyway . I will walways carry your heart :D
To my dear neighbours : yes yes here is your mention NATE AND gayBRETT ROCK MY WORLD haha I love you guys and your heart-hearts-heartsy! thing, Friggin adorable k! and I love the surprise :D will always remember it! and I do intend to try and outdo you
To my dear X-man : heh, thanks love. I'm touched by the way you defend my interests, and your one-liners never fail to make me LOL xD puckered up tighter then an eagle's ass in a powerdive indeed! now, if only youd stop typing LiKeee tHiiss!
To our new confidant : Don't worry too much, don't think too much. I'm sorry I'm lousy at advice, but I'l be a friend. And lakerol bribes coming your way soon :D
thats all I guess.
Peace out